Wednesday 18 November 2020

HOUSE SHADOWS - 100 word story

 This week's Friday Fictioneers photo prompt supplied by Sarah Potter led me down a potentially spooky path.




House shadows



The light drained from the sky like someone opening a vein. Our world turned monochrome. I shivered.

'You okay?' said Robbie.

Shadowy movements in the garden.

'It's just the wind,' said Robbie.

The night thickened with cold.

'They got bears hereabouts?'

Robbie huffed. 'You crazy?'

'Well.'

'We need firewood.' He went outside.

Minutes passed. I finally cracked open the door. 'Robbie?'

A thump.

'Robbie? Are you messing with me?'

A barnacled shadow moved on the edge of vision. I heard saw-toothed voices and slammed the door shut. Heavy footsteps on the deck.

I waited for the door to open.


I hope you enjoyed this story and I look forward to your comments. 


If you wish to read more Friday Fictioneers stories, you can find them listed HERE


If you'd like to join in the challenge, you'll find all the information posted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields 


- her blog is listed on 'My Blog List' on the right hand side of this page.


On a final note - I always attempt to visit the blogs of everyone who comments on mine. If I haven't commented on yours it's either because I haven't been redirected to your blog when I've clicked on your name or because you have a wordpress account that requires me to sign into wordpress first. 
Please check and amend your settings. Thanks.










44 comments:

  1. Dear Susan,

    I'm yelling "don't open that door!" Ominous and well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

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  2. Saw-toothed voices cannot be a good thing! Nice one Susan!

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  3. Replies
    1. The scariest thing about horror stories is the not knowing. :)

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  4. First I was telling Robbie not to go out. Now I'm telling her to block the door! I really liked saw-toothed voices, as well!

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  5. So creepy and nerve-wracking!

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    1. Yep, I wouldn't want to be her, waiting for that door to open.

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  6. Excellent from the first line to the end! You set it up up well.

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  7. Replies
    1. That was my intention, so it's good to know I achieved my aim, Liz. :)

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  8. Saw toothed voices... that's a phrase to reckon with.

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    1. Thanks, Sandra. I have no idea how I came up with that one. The subconscious is a strange beast.

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  9. Now that is really spooky! Absolutely brilliant Susan.

    My yarn!

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    Replies
    1. Thanks, Keith. I love to write a spooky tale now and then.

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  10. Sounds like Robbie was wearing a red shirt in best Star Trek traditions!

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    1. No idea what that means, CE, but thanks for commenting. :)

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  11. poor robbie, i think he's either dead or has turned into a monster.

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    Replies
    1. That's the nature of open-ended horror stories: the reader has to draw their own conclusions. :)

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  12. Yikes. No way that door is going to stay closed. RUN!!

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    1. Terrifying dilemma - it might be Robbie and the voices might be her overactive imagination. Only one way for her to find out...

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  13. A horrifying wait for the door to open. Scary tale indeed!

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    1. Yes, I wouldn't like to be in her shoes, Brenda.

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  14. I'm getting the feeling waiting for the door to open is a bad call. Maybe bolting the door and running to the car if she has access to the garage from inside the house.

    I love the title. It's just so literal.

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  15. Creepy. I wanted to read on...

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    Replies
    1. He he, you know what they say: keep 'em waiting, keep 'em wanting...

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  16. Perfect scene for a horror movie!

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    Replies
    1. He he. I need to get out more. Thanks for commenting, Magarisa.

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  17. Sounds ominous, Robbie's a gonna and all she can do is wait for the inevitable. Well written

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    1. Or Robbie could be playing a trick on her. Thanks for feedback, Michael.

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  18. This could either be a scary, hair-raising outcome or a really funny practical joke, I'm really hoping it's the latter. And then she can playfully punch him afterwards.

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    1. Ha ha - if someone played a practical joke like that on me, I think I'd punch him painfully rather than playfully! :)

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  19. Well done! Poor Robbie (presumably)! Hopefully she'll get her wits about her.

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    1. Either way, let's hope she gets out of this one intact. Thanks for commenting, Sascha.

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Many thanks for commenting. I appreciate your feedback.