Wednesday, 2 May 2018

CRAZY CHARLIE - 100 word story

A house in the middle of nowhere and a set of rough steps leading up to it was this week's Friday Fictioneers photo prompt. It got me thinking about the sort of person who might live there.


PHOTO PROMPT © Karen Rawson




CRAZY CHARLIE


Rumours cloaked the old man like a mystery. The locals in the bar ignored him. They called him Crazy Charlie.
He cycled home in wintry sunshine.
Two straggly dogs greeted him.
'Good lads.'
Charlie climbed up to the ramshackle house. In the kitchen he rummaged for leftovers. 
Outside, the dogs were fidgeting, toenails tap-dancing on the porch.
Charlie threw the leftovers into bowls and sat down. The dogs settled into their meal. Charlie's face creaked into a smile.
Wriggling his shoulders, he relaxed. A gecko skittered away, looking for smaller prey. Charlie closed his eyes, hoping the bullies wouldn't return.

I hope you enjoyed this story and I look forward to your comments. 

If you wish to read more Friday Fictioneers stories, you can find them listed HERE




If you'd like to join in the challenge, you'll find all the information posted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields 
- her blog is listed on 'My Blog List' on the right hand side of this page.

On a final note - I always try to visit the blogs of everyone who comments on mine. If I haven't commented on yours it's either because I haven't been able to find your blog when I've clicked on your name or because you have a wordpress account that requires me to sign in first. 




58 comments:

  1. Really moving Susan. You managed to evoke a strong visual sense of his house and life and made us feel for him too - really well done

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    1. Thank you, Lynn - it's good to know that the story worked for you.

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  2. It's sad that people mistreat anyone who is different. It forces people to retreat into solitude. I'd imagine it isn't Charlie who's crazy, but the people who mistreat him.

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    1. I agree - Charlie might be a bit different, but I'm not convinced he's the crazy one.

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  3. Great photo prompt. I love those stairs. Charlie's definitely one of those people intent on living life his way, no matter how many people that might alienate. He has his dogs, and himself, for friends. I doubt he needs more.

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    1. Yes, we should celebrate the 'Charlies' in our world. :)

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  4. Poor Charlie, I hope he is happy there.

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    1. Yes, even his dogs appear to be too gentle to deter the bullies.

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  5. I loved this vivid sketch of this man. Made me love Charlie!

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    1. Thanks for your feedback, Karen. Charlie is misunderstood - glad the story made you love him!

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  6. Very touching. I love Charlie. As long as we all aren't hurting anyone in any way in this world it is our individuality that makes us special. Brilliantly written.

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    1. Thanks, Lisa - yes, I think this story developed because of all the horrible things humans are capable of to doing to people they don't know or perceive as 'different'.

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  7. Sounds like a nice life - except for the bullies. Leave poor Charlie alone!

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    1. Yes, even people who live quietly have to put up with things from the outside world, Alistair.

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  8. Excellent use of words! I am always impressed with a short powerful story like this. Well done!

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    1. Thank you, Darlene. I'm glad the story worked for you.

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  9. Awwe, and they call THIS gentle soul crazy?

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  10. Beautifully written. We learned so much about him in a handful of words.


    My FriFic tale is called Solace!

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    1. Thanks, Keith. I love the challenge of portraying a character in very few words.

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  11. I could sense the mood, the atmosphere, the day... really well done.

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    1. Thank you, Sandra - glad my attempt to evoke the scene worked for you.

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  12. You paint us a compelling picture of Charlie's life. I particularly like your description of the dogs, "toenails tap-dancing on the porch". And you're dead right on the matter of cherishing those who are different.

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    1. Thanks, Penny - appreciate your feedback. The dog description came from my experience of my own dogs clattering around, waiting for their grub. :)

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  13. Well captured, Susan. You have created a lot in a few words.

    marion

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    1. Thank you for commenting, Marion - much appreciated.

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  14. Dear Susan,

    Your story went way beyond the hundred words in its content. Evocative and atmospheric and ever so well written.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

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    1. Thank you, Rochelle. Let's hope this bodes well for the book I'm attempting to write!

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  15. I like Charlie, and in a way I envy him his solitude!

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    1. Thanks, Liz. Solitude is nice when it's your choice.

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  16. The last sentence really says so much how we treat people who are a little different.

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    1. Yes, it's a sad fact of life, isn't it? Thanks for commenting, Bjorn.

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  17. You really described this so very well. How someone so sweet as Charlie could be bullied is beyond me... Hope they don't come back!

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    1. Dale, he lives an unorthodox life - and sadly those are the sort of people who are bullied.

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  18. Loved this. So descriptive. The sounds of the dogs on the porch. Terrific

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  19. Such a beautiful atmosphere, almost idyllic, with Charlie and his dogs. And then the last line makes it clear, it's other people who can make his life hell. And they call him crazy...

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  20. Love the tap dancing toenails.

    I have a feeling the last lot of bullies won't return as they never left - just became leftovers?

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    1. Ha ha - you've spotted a potential twist, Patsy! :)

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  21. Aw, poor Charlie. So vividly written.

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  22. At least he has his dogs for company. Thanks for commenting, Bettina.

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  23. Makes one wonder who're the real crazies

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    1. They're hidden in plain view all around us, Dahlia! :)

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  24. So sad that people bully those who are different and call them "crazy". Interesting take on the prompt!

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    1. Thanks for commenting, Joy. It is sad, isn't it?

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  25. Great imagery and a wonderful message.

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  26. Thanks for commenting - appreciate your kind words.

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  27. Sounds like Charlie is content as he is, except for those who aren't content for him to be who he is. Bullies. Blech.

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    1. What I find so inexplicable about bullies is their lack of empathy, Linda. At least Charlie has a home and companions. Thanks for commenting. :)

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  28. It is strange how the independent and happily-contented, are thought of as crazy. Good for, Charlie, I say :)

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    1. Thanks, Fatima - and I agree: three cheers for Charlie! :)

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  29. It sounds like he's happy in his own little world. Shame others have to spoil it.

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    1. Yes, people like Charlie choose solitary lives, but they run the risk of being treated badly because they are 'different'.

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  30. You made the old man and his dogs very real and when you wrote that he hoped the bullies wouldn't return I felt an extreme anger that someone would invade such a gentle man's space. I liked the use of creaked.

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    1. Thanks for your feedback, Irene - appreciate it. :)

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  31. Powerful take on the prompt. It described a deep story within 100 words ! Well written.

    https://trailbrooklane.blogspot.com/2018/05/the-stairs.html

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    1. Thanks for commenting, Jaya - glad you liked it.

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