 |
| Sandra Crook |
PLAIN SIGHT
When Willie nearly
burnt his house down, Jane took him in. His foibles were mostly
manageable, but when Willie built a stack of broken terracotta and
kindling, Jane got annoyed.
'You've created an
eyesore, Dad.'
'Now then, Jane lass.
Where else can they hide?'
'And just who are
they?'
'Hush,
lass, someone might hear.' He leaned towards his daughter. 'My stack
allows them to hide in plain sight.'
Jane
gave up. 'Alright, but no lighting fires.'
Willie
crouched in front of the pallets. 'Alright lads,' he whispered. 'She
hasn't caught on.'
The
stack shivered and crackled in reply.
Willie
chuckled.
I hope you enjoyed this story and I look forward to your comments.
If you wish to read more Friday Fictioneers stories, you can find them listed HERE
If you wish to read more Friday Fictioneers stories, you can find them listed HERE
If you'd like to join in the challenge, you'll find all the information posted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields
- her blog is listed on 'My Blog List' on the right hand side of this page.
On a final note - I always try to visit the blogs of everyone who comments on mine. If I haven't commented on yours it's either because I haven't been able to find your blog when I've clicked on your name or because you have a wordpress account that requires me to sign in first.
He's fanciful but harmless. So far
ReplyDeleteHe he - maybe! Thanks for commenting, Neil.
DeleteSinister, definitely!!
ReplyDeleteConsidering he nearly burnt his own house down...? :)
DeleteI don't know if he was sinister or just demented, but he gives me the creeps!
ReplyDeleteYeah, he's not quite the ticket, is he?
DeleteSomething tells me a fire is coming.
ReplyDeleteYou might be right!
DeleteI think he enjoys the world in which he lives. So that's fine. :)
ReplyDeleteHe's certainly living in his own little world!
DeleteI don't necessarily think that Willie's the one who "nearly burnt his house down." I think that maybe "they" did it.
ReplyDeleteHe he - now that's something worth considering!
DeleteUh oh. Shivered and crackled? I feel for her.
ReplyDeleteShe might have a problem with her Dad and his stack. :)
ReplyDeleteYou've given Willie a lovely, friendly Yorkshire voice, and your story is a fun, imaginative take on the prompt.
ReplyDeleteWell spotted, Penny! Thanks for commenting.
DeleteSounds like Willie is playing with fire--again.
ReplyDeleteDeborah
Yes, Jane's going to have to keep an eye on him. Thanks for commenting, Deborah.
DeleteHe's in league with the fire people, she better get a hose nearby. Great imagination.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comment, Gah - glad you liked it.
DeleteDear Susan,
ReplyDeleteThat last line left me crackling and shivering a bit. Imaginative story.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Yes, Jane might have a problem. Thanks for commenting, Rochelle.
Deleteooooo....the stack shivered and crackled. Sounds a lot like fire to me. Well done.
ReplyDeleteYes, there's something going on in that stack!
Deletei think he's playfully crazy. it's time to commit him to the mental institution. :)
ReplyDeleteThat could be true - maybe only he could hear the crackling. :)
DeleteHehe! She doesn't know what's coming. Great story! Makes you wonder what kind of little monsters he is hiding over there.
ReplyDeleteWhatever they may be, I don't want to encounter them. :)
DeleteOoh, I can't decide! You've cleverly not used any adjectives which would lean me one way or the other, so I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt. For now... :-)
ReplyDeleteHe he - he might be harmlessly nutty, Alistair. :)
DeleteGreat story! I love the ending.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Jennifer. This is the sort of story that deserves a sequel... maybe!
DeleteA good one! Keeps us guessing.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Darlene. Yes, sometimes I have to leave a story open to interpretation. :)
DeleteHe's as harmless as Putin!
ReplyDeleteHa ha - oh my goodness, what a comparison!
DeleteEeek! Jane had better watch out!
ReplyDeleteYes, I think she needs to keep a firm eye on Dad!
DeleteThere is definitely trouble afoot... now whether or not dad is evil is hard to say... he may be a tad "touched" though...
ReplyDeleteHe he - you might be right.
DeleteTime to call Mr. Newt Scamander, me thinks. Willie surely has a colony of some magical creature in those stacks.
ReplyDeleteHe might, Varad, he might! :)
DeleteIf it had cackled rather than crackled it would have been sinister.
ReplyDeleteNow that's a point to ponder. :)
DeleteEither he's got a problem or she's about to have one! Nice one Susan
ReplyDeleteOr a third possibility: they both continue happily in their own little worlds. :)
DeleteI crackled and shivered too. Willie is upto something. Dark and sinister. Like your story.
ReplyDeletePiyali from Wordpress
He he - thanks, Piyali. :)
DeleteNice one Susan. I think Willie is OK. Like the atmosphere of your story.
ReplyDeleteThank you! Feedback always appreciated. :)
ReplyDeleteQuite an imagination! (At least we hope that's all it is).
ReplyDeleteHa ha - let's hope so, Dawn. :)
DeleteOminous yet well layered.
ReplyDeleteThanks for commenting - yes, it could be an ominous sign.
DeleteI am on Willie's side. I believe in the lads.
ReplyDeleteHe he - thanks, Jolly. :)
DeleteDad has got his own army of bugs or are they just aliens in disguise? Of course he could be just stark raving mad instead ;-)
ReplyDeleteJury's out, Subroto. :)
DeleteVery intriguing.
ReplyDeleteThanks for commenting, Lisa. Yes, I deliberately left it open to interpretation. :)
DeleteI was very surprised that this was about her father, Susan, as I thought 'Jane took him in' referred to a child. It is definitely a sinister little tale. :)
ReplyDeletemarion
Thanks for the feedback, Marion. I thought that saying: 'his house', would indicate that Willie was an adult. :)
Delete